Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Lit and Music Review

I was published in this month's issue of Lit and Music Review! (page 7)

Sunday, November 9, 2008

When Hate Reigns

Inaugural day.
The crowd gathers; people clamor
as Hate steps up to the podium.
He is calm, collect.
The weather is cool, brisk.
The people are excited and alive from the commemoration.
Hate is poised over the calamity of noise
as onlookers stare up at Him in awe.
Tall, almost elegant with His grand gestures.
His voice thunders in everyone’s head.
He speaks:
“People! People! I am here today –
before you –
as a symbol of a new beginning that is about to take place.
We are on the threshold of a new era,
an era free from the destruction of obscenity;
the infestation of affectivity.
At the forefront of this populace
I shall begin the absolution to freedom.”
And Hate smiled.
And the people cheered
for they had a leader who was brave.

Then there was a dark cloud that loomed above - -
fat and swollen with rain - -
but the people didn’t care
for rain was good
it fed the ground,
which nourished life
so it mattered none that it was murky mysterious rain.

And the rain fell,
and Hate smiled,
and the people cheered
for they had a leader who provided for the people.

Then a might wind rose
and carried with it the spirit of transformation,
the embodiment of change.
The wind was good because it brought change –
change was good because it is fundamental
so it mattered none that the wind eroded the land
that the rain had cultivated.

And the wind blew,
and the rain fell,
and Hate smiled,
and the people cheered
for they had a leader who pioneered growth.

Then the land trembled
and it shook with the force of a thousand secrets never revealed
and the rumbling of truth that none believed.
But it was good because it carried the knowledge of the beginning of time,
so it mattered none that time tumbled away under the roar of the soil.

And the Earth shook,
and the wind blew,
and the rain fell,
and Hate smiled,
and the people cheered
for they had a leader who promoted the sovereignty of faith.

And Hate stood motionless at the pulpit.
The crowd trampled over one another
for a glimpse of His auspicious demeanor,
that flicker of something almost sinister in His eye,
which they knew meant that He was a man of great power.

And Hate smiled
and the people cheered
for they had a leader who would lead them through a revolution –
and the Earth shook,
and the wind blew,
and the rain fell,
and Hate smiled;
but the people
the people quailed from this future
for it was different
it was unfamiliar.
And Hate stepped away from the platform
as the onlookers stared up in awe.
The silence echoed through the heart of each spectator.
This was, indeed, the commencement of a new instigation of life.

Written by: Michael Coulombe
© 2008

Saturday, November 1, 2008

November '08: Jason Stuart

1. What is the most challenging thing facing writers today? Especially a comedian?
New material that’s original and where you can’t see the joke coming. I work at that all the time.

2. Where do you find your inspiration to write?
My Family who is insane! My every day life and Sarah Palin! You know I can see her house from my terrace, so I guess I'm ready to be governor of ALASKA. If I can see the moon does that make me an astronaut!

3. What current projects are you working on?
My DVD of my stand up special JASON STUART: MAKING IT TO THE MIDDLE comes out November 18th and you can get it
shameless plug

4. Who are your biggest influences?
Scott Thompson, Sandra Bernhardt, Joan Rivers, Louie Anderson, Richard Lewis, Lily Tomlin, Don Rickles and so many gay folks who came before me and who opened the path like Kate Clinton and Harvey Fierstein,

5. In your opinion, what makes your comedy different from others?
I'm not really masc. or fem.. I'm not the best at anything...I'm like Cher!

6. What is your ideal writing sanctuary?
When the joke works and it comes easy the audience loves it!

7. Do you feel that being an actor influences your writing?
I am great at improv. I have used that skill when I was on MY WIFE & KIDS, my film 10 ATTITUDES, A DAY WITHOUT A MEXICAN , FAT ACTRESS and so many more. Its really helped me make my work come alive.

8. As of right now, what are you most proud of with your career?
That I am still here and able to make a living. Also that I got out of bed this morning and my face didn't drop